03-22-2007, 03:52 PM
I thought I'd share with you a little something I wrote this week.
Important Announcement
Palm Sunday
Due to unusual drought conditions in the desert, there is an overwhelming shortage of palms for the use of church congregations in New England. Because of this, there has unfortunately developed a black market for contraband palm fronds in the smaller towns of Northern New Hampshire. We understand that some unscrupulous individuals are holding local churches to ransom and withholding palm supplies in the hope of a great return on their arborical sales.
Pastor Smith did, in fact, attempt to grease a few palms at the Synod office but he was ordered to leave or be arrested. However we are pleased to note that somewhere in Boston, this year's palms will be inexpicably difficult to hold on to.
The few fronds that were available legally were also prohibitively expensive, therefore, this year on Palm Sunday (April 1st) it will be necessary for each person attending the 10:15 service at St George's to bring with them a cut branch for the Procession of "Palms". If you do not own a garden and do not wish to cut branches from your neighbor's garden, our Sunday School students have made some substitute palms out of pipe cleaners and tissue paper which may be used instead. (Unfortunately all the green tissue paper was sold prior to St Patrick's day, so they substituted Halloween Orange.) This will result in a rather more unusual procession, but at least the "palms" can be recycled for next year if the shortage continues.
Thank you for your understanding.
Avril Zuerst
Warship Committee
Important Announcement
Palm Sunday
Due to unusual drought conditions in the desert, there is an overwhelming shortage of palms for the use of church congregations in New England. Because of this, there has unfortunately developed a black market for contraband palm fronds in the smaller towns of Northern New Hampshire. We understand that some unscrupulous individuals are holding local churches to ransom and withholding palm supplies in the hope of a great return on their arborical sales.
Pastor Smith did, in fact, attempt to grease a few palms at the Synod office but he was ordered to leave or be arrested. However we are pleased to note that somewhere in Boston, this year's palms will be inexpicably difficult to hold on to.
The few fronds that were available legally were also prohibitively expensive, therefore, this year on Palm Sunday (April 1st) it will be necessary for each person attending the 10:15 service at St George's to bring with them a cut branch for the Procession of "Palms". If you do not own a garden and do not wish to cut branches from your neighbor's garden, our Sunday School students have made some substitute palms out of pipe cleaners and tissue paper which may be used instead. (Unfortunately all the green tissue paper was sold prior to St Patrick's day, so they substituted Halloween Orange.) This will result in a rather more unusual procession, but at least the "palms" can be recycled for next year if the shortage continues.
Thank you for your understanding.
Avril Zuerst
Warship Committee